I've never seen any ads for Red Stripe, that I can recall, which is pretty odd, considering the amount of TV I watch. But I've been meaning to try it for quite awhile, as I want to try just about everything, sooner or later. Especially different beers. So I was thinking about it for awhile, and then one time a customer at the store I was working at was looking for some, but it was out of stock, so she said people must have realized how good it is. Or something like that. Another time I mentioned to a coworker that I was planning on trying it eventually, and he said it wasn't that good. But I didn't care what he thought because he was crazy. Later, Violently Angry Rasta did an article about it, so that clinched it, sooner or later I would have to try it.

But, it's sort of expensive, and I'm poor. Not as poor as V.A. Rasta, of course, but by American standards, I am. Not as poor as Americans get, either. At least I have a job and a place to live, and cable, and stuff. But I can't really afford to go pay seven bucks for six bottles of beer whenever I feel like it. I'll tell you, one time, probably late last year, my sister (with whom I have been sharing an apartment since last summer, though this summer we moved to a new one) and I decided to start each putting a little money each week into two boxes. One to save up for any unexpected car-related expenses that might come up, and the other for a "whatever" fund, to be used for going to the movies, and things like that. However, after just a few weeks, we had to dip into both boxes, and then never got around to restarting the funds, cuz we were always out of money soon after each paycheck. But, a few weeks ago, I started forcing myself to set aside five bucks each week in a can, not to be touched... but I didn't really have any idea when or why I might allow myself to touch the money in the future. So, I had like twenty bucks in there now.

Today is the first of three days off this week. I almost always have 3 days off each week, because the company I work for won't hire people full time. But it's always sort of random which days I get off, and they're not necessarily in a row. But this week they are. But that's irrelevant. Anyway, I had a tape I had to watch, to catch up on shows I've missed. Because that's the most important thing in life. I watched Cyborg 009, then Inuyasha. Then I had an idea: I'd dip into my savings and go buy some Red Stripe! Also I wanted to get a couple new kinds of gum that've been out for a month or two, I guess. But I didn't find them at the store I went to, so I just got the Red Stripe, to drink while watching the rest of my tape. I watched Wolf's Rain and two eps of Case Closed.

The idea was to piss off Violently Angry Rasta by writing an article about how I, a stupid white American, was drinking Red Stripe while watching anime. I do love writing, so pretty much any idea I have seems worth the effort. I'm not sure if this would piss him off or not, but since he does seem prone to anger, especially against people like me, I thought it wouldn't matter if it actually deserved his wrath or not. Now, don't get me wrong... I think he's pretty funny. I know he's not here to entertain me, but I find his writings amusing, anyway. And I agree with some of the things he has to say. Sort of. I'm the kind of person who thinks there's some good and some bad in all the cultures of the world, and it's not good to be... well, anyplace-centric. So, I'm against tourists treating Jamaicans like clowns, or whatever he said. Of course, I'd never be a tourist anywhere, especially Jamaica, because like I said, I'm fairly poor, and I can't afford to travel. I c ould never afford to get to Jamaica, let alone stay in one of the resorts where white Americans like me would be safe from the violently angry white-hating locals.

Hmmm, what else was I gonna say? Oh yes, the beer. I liked it. Actually I've only had four so far, so I should open my fifth now. It tastes alright, and while the intoxicating effects aren't as... intoxicating... as some beers I've had, it's not bad, either. And... it's kind of tingly, the taste. It sort of seems more carbonated to me than most beers. Not fizzy, like soda, or anything, but... yeah, kinda tingly. I like it. Plus the bottles are so chibi! (That's a Japanese word that any otaku should know. Look it up, Mr. V.A. Rasta. Maybe it'll piss you off a little more, even though in my mind it's a compliment. Of course, even if you take it that way, I'm sure you'll find my complimenting Red Stripe as insulting to Jamaicans.) I don't want to insult Jamaica or Jamaicans. I'm sure as I say there's some good in every place, and every people. And I'm sorry for any sort of insult that they may perceive, real or imagined, from foreigners, especially Americans. And I'm sorr y for all their problems that have nothing to do with us, as I'm sorry for all the problems of the world. And I don't really want to insult V.A. Rasta, either, because I like his writing, and that's the most important thing in the world. Art, entertainment, whether in literary form, or television, or whatever. Of course, I suppose it's a luxury, seeing art as the most important thing, when some people, in any country in the world, can't even afford proper food, clothes, shelter, etc. Still, I wouldn't want to live without it. Life in and of itself is pointless, one needs to actually enjoy life, and art is a big part of what makes that possible. Especially for someone like me, who doesn't have much to enjoy about real life, and only survives because of the escapism entertainment provides. Because I'm poor and insane and no good at making friends and hate almost everything that other people enjoy, and will probably never allow myself to fall in love, not that anyone wou ld ever want me, and I'll die a virgin, not that I care... and I think too much, and nothing makes sense, and... Oh, I could go on and on, but I won't, because it's boring and pointless.

But gosh, Mr. V.A. Rasta, what do you think about my complaining about my petty problems? And drinking Red Stripe? And watching anime? And using words like "chibi"? Yeah, I'm entertained by you, even if I see you as a real person with valid points of view. Wanna make something of it? Hmmm? Cuz I live thousands of miles from Jamaica. If I, someone with a job, can't afford to go there, how are you going to come here? Huh? That was the other point of writing this whole article: even if I piss you off, you're too far away to kick my ass! Ha! And even if you do make your way here, and kill me, I won't even care, because I've never been a huge fan of life, anyway. Life. Don't talk to me about life. It sucks! Well, it both sucks and rocks. I'd say about 90% sucks, 10% rocks. Mmm... also there's alot of... indifferentness. Boringness. Stuff that neither sucks nor rocks, but just is. But I don't want to try to figure out different percentages, so just file the indifferent stuff under "sucks" and leave it as is, 90%.

Shit, mon, this article sucks. But at least that puts it in the majority. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to finish my Red Stripe....